Biting the Big Cheese... Or; How Many Celebrities Can Kick The Bucket in a Single Week

...and 3 of them are actually kind of sad. The last one I'm going to mention, which is the one EVERYONE can't stop talking about...well, the vultures can have him for all I give a fuck.

Farrah Fawcett: I think I came along *just* after her fame had fallen off, so I was never a huge fan, but I think she was a wonderful person. I did watch the special she put on, and gained a big admiration for a strong, resilient woman who just didn't put up with any bullshit. She kicked much ass and took many names. Even after going through those treatments and suffering horrible pain, she was still able and willing to hand the tabloid people their own asses. I may not have known her through her work, but I started checking her out a lot more and what I did find out about her was really nothing but admirable. You will be missed, Farrah. I actually cried a little when I found out this amazing woman had finally gone to her final home. At least there is no more pain, girlfriend. She's now with the real angels, kicking ass in heaven.

Ed McMahon: Didn't really know much about him either, but he seemed to have a lot of crap handed to him late in life. He seemed to be a pretty funny dude. Again, a useful member of the human race. But he was old. Not a real surprise.

Billy Mays: Dude, seriously? The infomercial dude! Never again will we hear this guy trying to sell us OxyClean or the Awesome Auger. I'm a little sad. Like when the movie guy...whatzisname...Don LaFontaine. (Gotta love the internet). Infomercials will never be the same. I wonder what he's pitching in heaven?

...and because I can't avoid mentioning this waste, this being "dead celebrities week"...Michael Jackson. Even if he *didn't* get his kicks touching little boys, this guy was a douche. Yeah, he could sing and dance, like 20 years ago. The last 20 years, though, what did he do besides fuck up his face, dress his children up in masks and dangle babies out of windows? And WHAT are they thinking, leaving his children with his 79 year old mother? They do know that his father is abusive, I mean duh? Isn't that why the guy was fucked up in the first place? Bloody hell. Stupid. I'm sorry. Just because the guy is dead doesn't make him any less of a douche.

So flame me. I don't give a fuck. My journal, my opinion, my business.

R.I.P. Aunt Tomi

At around 5am this morning, my aunt went to her final rest. She was an accomplished artist and a vivacious personality, before 20 years ago when an inoperable brain tumor stole the life she had. With aggressive chemo and radiation, her cancer eventually went away, but the damage the tumor and the treatment did to her was irreversible. She lived 20 years, the longest living survivor of that particular type of brain cancer.

I'm not sad that she's gone, because the Tomi we all knew had gone a long time ago. She is at peace now with her maker and home where she belongs. Goodbye, Aunt Tomi. You are loved always, and remembered for the loving person you have always been.

I fucking knew something like this would happen

My cousin is going back to prison.

Because his mother is a raging cunt who needs to go into a dark corner and die somewhere.

She called the police and lied to them and had him arrested. He wasn't getting his disability money fast enough for her and she was tired of taking care of him.

If I ever see that fucking gaping slutwad anywhere on the street, she may as well call the hospital in advance and book her a room because I am going to pound the everliving shit out of her. She'll wish she was dead by the time I'm done.

My poor little buddy. God, it kills me that there is nothing I can do. I'm bawling. I hate very few people, but I hate that old baseball glove looking vagina face.

I'd LIKE the fucking whorebag to read this. I'd like nothing more than for her to say a. fucking. word. to me. She's not a mother. She's never been a mother. She's ALWAYS used those kids. First to get back at my uncle after the divorce, and now she's just using him because he brings in money for her.

She's a waste of space, a completely and totally useless human being. Karma is a bitch though, and she will get hers. She will want to have a relationship with her son one of these days and if he's smart, he'll turn his back and walk away and let her live in the filth that is her life.

I would like to stab out my uterus with a dull spoon.

The red tide is a week early.

A WEEK EARLY!

Along with Aunt Flo, comes the cousins Bitchy, Crampy, Moody and Weepy. Uncle Bloaty doesn't come too often, but he's here this month. Just to add to the fun.

What's the point of me even HAVING a period? After Boo was born, I got the band aid operation. I can no longer spawn. I guess since I still have a working system, my stupid uterus still thinks, "Hey, gotta prepare to have a baby once a fucking month!"

Why is it once a month? Isn't that a little overkill? So Eve told Adam to eat the damn apple. For that, we get horrible pain in childbirth (thank you, science, for epidurals!) and to bleed out our cootchy once a month and "the man shall be your lord and master". For a week at a fucking time. Adam got...toil and work all day in the fields where thorns and briars pricked him (only to come home for his wife to slave over him every night you know, the Lord and Master thing, then he gets to prick her...) What a bunghole!

And don't get me started on the snake. The snake got off pretty damn easy. He lost his limbs. I'd make a bargain with God that if he would take my period away I'd cut off my arms and legs myself.

My cramps are so fucking bad this month. My mood is worse. I'm going to steal a saying from my vegetable killing friend here and say that I wish I could stick the entire human race into a blender.