I must admit, Veggie, you are right.

I had a strange obsession with owning a snuggie. I love blankets, and I think, a blanket with sleeves, perfect! I'm not over the age of 65 yet so I will not be wearing the thing in public. Ever. People my age and younger do this, and as much as I thought this was going to be the coolest invention ever made, I do not think the snuggie look is stylin for the ages of 13-65. They should be forbidden public wear for those age groups.

So a week ago, I buy one. I go to CVS and bought the one that donates money to breast cancer research. That would be the only positive part of the Snuggie experience. It was bright cotton candy pink Snuggie with a pocket. I'm over the moon.

Until I get the fucker home and I realize something. Snuggies are not for short people. I am a short person. 5'3" and a clumsy mc'klutz even when I don't try to move with a 6 foot blanket in my path because I do forget to pick the fucker up. I'm glad that my superpower is that I do not trip. My elementary school was a combat zone. I had to train my brain to never trip. Not that the snotnosed fuckers wouldn't try. I'm clumsy, I drop shit and bump into shit, bump into people. I will never be comfortable in a china shop. But I do not trip.

After the age of 65, I'm going to aspire to the wear the most loud, ridiculous, bedazzled crazy cat lady clothes. Because if you live to be so old, you should be able to say and wear and do whatever the fuck you want. I don't think I'd ever be obnoxious to someone who isn't obnoxious to me, but after that age (except in extreme cases of pissing me off, then I'll let you know now) I will let you know exactly how much you suck as a human being.

The Snuggie has become my most expensive cat blanket. Jinxie loves it.



She loves Scott and will claim his lap when he gets home. But I've been going for walks lately, and Scott tells me that Jinxie will wait by the back door and cry the entire time I'm gone. We call her puppycat because she will follow me everywhere and she feels she must at least go into every room I'm in. I haven't been to the bathroom by myself in years. I have never had or met a cat that is so much a baby. And it's so funny. Every once in a while when I let her go outside with me (which isn't very often) and when she gets the urge to leave the yard (even rarer still), the timing of the cars around here is brilliant. Because she forgets that now when she goes into the backyard, she's going to see those big scary things that make big noise move, and she'll flatten on the ground, look back at me and cry, then when I'll pick her up she'll cling to my shoulder. She'll forget about being brave for while.

I'm convinced this cat is made entirely out of sunshine, cuddles, kisses and love.

The little kitten that has been running around here has been declawed.

Kitten. DECLAWED. Outside.

Next time I see his owner I'm going to punch her. Hard. Or not, but I WILL tell her what I think of her. Which is that she's a stupid and selfish bitch. I am against declawing in general. In most civilized countries, it's illegal. It's mutilation. Most people don't even know what it is. They don't simply take a cat's claws. Imagine being annoyed with your fingernails, so you amputate your finger up to the first or second knuckle. That is what thousands of people do to their cats because they are too lazy to train them to a scratcher. SORRY. That's how I feel. It took me a grand total of 2 farking days to train my cat to the scratcher. Not. That. Hard.

On top of that, this kitten is *always* outside. Because his crackhead owners can't be messed to bother with him. I fed him siome. He was very hungry. Then I felt his claws and my annoyance with his owners turned to outrage. This kitten is outside with no way to defend himself. He can't even hunt.

Poor baby. And people wonder why I think most of the human race is destined to devolve into poo flinging monkeys.

Saturday night out with my cousin

...was pretty fun. Got to squishle some kittens that one of their many cats had before we left. They were adorable! One thing I could respect about his mom if I could like her is that she seems to like cats just about as much as I do. In fact, she's pretty much advanced along the path of the crazy cat lady. That will not sway me from my destiny, only I'll...spay and neuter my cats because I just think it's wrong not to.

My cousin chose a chinese buffet. Another thing I love (and always have) about this kid is that he will say highly inappropriate things in public and it can be pretty hilarious. We sat down, then grabbed our plates and went up to the buffet. Everything was labled but one or 2 things. I'm looking at something and I'm like, "What's this?" and he goes, "Probably cat," which I just bust out laughing. So then I grab the teriyaki chicken and he says, "Cat on a stick?" Then I say, "No, I think it smells more like dog."

Of course, we both knew we weren't eating cat or dog...that's kind of the way the kid is though. It doesn't really matter who's around either. Like the restaurant employees, for instance. Which, me being evil, made me snicker that much harder. And sometimes, instead of being embarassed, it's more fun to roll with it. My boyfriend looked like he wanted to fall into the floor and disappear into an alternate universe, but I think he had fun.

Then we had to take him back home, and hugged some more kittens before we left. I hope to make this a regular thing. Take him out every other weekend or so.

My daughter has a doctor's appointment today at 3:15 because she said she felt like going to school today. I'm just hoping something can be done to get rid of this freaking cough.